- m e r l y s s a -
- m e r l y s s a -
I'm not the exact "Care Bear" person that people will love. Neither am I a good friend. I'm serious.

I mean, define Good Friend or Best Friend or BFF or Twins-but-not-blood-related or whatever synonym you wanna call a "friend". I'm sure all of us define it differently, but typical person will answer "someone who will support me in everything I do, who will be there thru thick n thin, be a shoulder for me to cry on, make me laugh... et cetera." Familliar? A lot of people have been making comments on me... directly/indirectly... "we have not been spending time together", "you're so mean", "you're not listening to me", and the most common and overused phrase I've received "you've changed." Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining, nor am I having any 'friendship issues', it's just... a thought that suddenly crosses my mind.

Personally, I really feel I don't make a good company (no, not the law 222 business organisation's term of company -_-|||), company as in, companion, a friend to be exact. Why? Cuz I don't lend my shoulder to cry on, I'd probably don't support EVERYTHING that you do, I won't be there thru thick n thin and again, et cetera. In short, I'm like chipsmore. I'd be there when I'm there and I'm not there, simple cuz I'm not there. You can say I'm selfish, and be a hypocrite saying that you're not (or maybe I'm wrong, if that makes you happy). But, it's just me, I'm not a powerpuff girl that you can expect me to be there just cuz... I should. But hey, I'm not THAT mean okay, I'm created with feelings, especially sensitivity, which actually becomes my weak point. Anyways, I usually will realise when I need to care, and I will really care when I really want to, that sometimes you will cry blood cuz you are SOOOOOOOOO touched. (ok, thats me exaggerating). But my point is, I care, in my own way. But I'm not a Care Bear that will always be there. Get me?........ No? Nevermind.

I do realise that I don't spend much time with my friends. I can be entertaining (*i think*), but I don't have a FIXED group of friends that I hang out together. I now understand why a person who used to be hanging out with almost ALL his/her friends, from different bunch, now prefer to hang out with himself/herself. Having a big network of friends does exhaust you when you have to please everyone... If you hang out with one bunch more than the other bunch, the other bunch will say "he/she's changed", or if it's the other way round. So, no matter what you do, there'll be a bunch that you cared so much would have a perception on you. Exhausting...no? And I even have friends who have this "care bear" nature, and end up this care bear has no one cared for him/her. It's because people wouldn't bother about his (assume this care bear is a jantan) needs, and that he'll always be there, cuz, he's a care bear! But again, because he is a care bear, he never complains and still care for the people around him. Cuz, he's a CARE BEAR! So, are you a care bear? =)

You must be wondering why am I suddenly so Emo right? In actual fact, I'm not. Well
yes I'm emo becos it's the end of my free week, but No, I'm not emo of this friendship thingy. I got over emo-ing on this issue and I've moved on. I'm pretty happy with the Care Bears I have around me, and I do constantly Thank God for all of them. The reason I write this entry, is because I have another entry (if God permits me to live until I write that entry, that is.) that relates to Caring as Purpose of Life. It's from a book I read called - Everyday with Jesus. I admit I'm not the person you can label "holy punya orang", but I have my faith. I highly recommend this book to those who thinks they cant read the whole bible but wants to get closer to God. It's cheap, RM7 and published every 2/3 months. And what you do is, to read a passage everyday that is only a page long (1/4 of A4), so if you can read textbooks/magazines/read this entry, you have the time! =) The passage is very simple to understand but makes you ponder on things, and is exactly what I need.

Oh, and No, I'm not paid to advertise. =) Just a recommendation.

So to all Care Bears out there. Good Job on being a great friend. and to all non-Care Bears -
BOOOOOOO! =P hahahah~

Till then,

P/S: Entry above is purely sharing of my thoughts and contains no intention directly/indirectly against any living/nonliving individual/creature.

I am so gonna let me kids wear these! Everyone, together with me... let's go... "awwwwwwww...."

Probably I shud get myself one too!
Should I get the middle blue one or pink one? hmm.... tough choice....
I think I shud get both~ no?

- m e r l y s s a -
Life without coffee was pretty... depressing. Why? A club borrowed my house's stove for the carnival... And they kinda forgot to return it cuz they thought no one at my house... So, I din have any coffee for the week, and yes, I'm still alive. Be surprised.

Nola, that isn't the main reason why i'm depressed... it's my lappie, who decided to play "see-if-you'll-die-without-me" game... On that night I planned to backup my files, the harddrive/disc/watever-u-call-it, crashed. No, not crashed just crashed... it's C.R.A.S.H.E.D = data lost = need to buy new harddrive/disc/watever-u-call-it = and.... did i say data lost already? as in DATA = pictures = assignments= stuffs = stuffss = and stuffssssss (like, movie, series that i spent in accumulation probably how many months or even years...) OMG.... c'mon everyone, say with me... O.M.G. *gasps*

But...nonetheless, I got over it. Cuz it's the 3rd time already... So, let's talk about something else...

Hmm, let's see, I have lots to blog about actually, cuz it's free week... and I even have pics... but kan, as mentioned, my lappie is back without its memory. stupid.

So, I'll try my best to update on what crap I've been doing...well, not all are crap la, i'm not that useless.

it has been a great final-sem... with my partner(s) in crime (PIC), complaining on the workload which I made no effort of, trying to avoid questions shooted at us (for example....)

*tilt ur head to the left to watch this*
#I don't think he reads my blog...so, I don't care..."#

But, there's a reason behind this... C** (the lecturer) was shooting questions at him till he cant tahan and plus, the class is a bit... B****G. (have to censor, manatau HE reads my blog) So, when I turn to my left wanna kacau this guy, I was like "ui???? (wondering where he went)" then, him, under the table "wei wei wei!!!".... i cant tahan i almost burst out laughing...even Joseph who's sitting beside me also din realise he was there, under the table, and...obviously, as u heard C** still 'preaching', he also din realise my little friend is hiding under the table... =s

Then... sometimes, we take pics in class... or... I candid them.

Left: One of my PIC - a die-hard Liverpool fans, thinks he looks cute with that look.
Middle: Group pic suddenly "ordered" by our lecturer, dont know why...
Right: Candid pic in MOS class, the guy in white is.... indescribably lame. but, funny at the same time.

Next, Fridge... *I know, I'm so random...* Sue me la!! =P

Nothing much to say, I cleaned my fridge, and it sparkles like my eyes~

See! Told u!!!! altho my eyes dont EXACTLY sparkle like that la~~~~

Next, Bowling and Nails...

I joined a bowling competition last month, but I won't tell you what competition is that, and of course, I did not win. We (team of 2 guys and 2 girls) had fun altho we did not win, and on top of that, I broke my Thumb nail, and that was during training - just the night before the actual game. *warning: this is a bit disgusting...*

Left: Just broken, I didn't know it was bleeding that time, so I threw another ball...
2nd pic: I saw blood, then I feel the pain. *it's always like that, I think if I din see the blood, I would have forgotten that I broke my nail*
3rd pic: Back home, tried to cut the rest of the nail, cuz it's broken half-way, as in, hmm... you know what I mean la right?
4th pic: tadaa.....Gone. it was freaking painful cuz my nail is so hard and it still bleed as I cut it...

But, don't worry, my nails are healthy and happy now, altho a bit short and ugly. =s

Next, Food...~ in Citrus and Xcuisine. Well, mostly took pics~~ =p

In Citrus, that day we went for dinner was that night when everyone are supposed to switch off their lights for 1 hour - yeah, earth hour.... so, Citrus also konon-nya update liddat la... then they came up with something creative.
Nice kan??

Then on last wed nite, went to watch Fast & Furious 4, with Ivy, Heather, Alan, Heng&Jen. Super nice movie, don't mind watching the 2nd time. =) Anyways, before that we had dinner in Xcuisine... first time there - food (INTERESTING), and the yingyong there quite nice @ Rm2.50 (hot one).... why I say the food interesting? you see for yourself la...
*I've seen this before, but not live, so it's quite interesting to me la*

O.M.G the thing in the food actually looked alive!

I mean, you know... the thingy is in motion like its in pain or something.... it doesn't taste nice tho.... not sure was it becos I keep on imagining it is alive in my stomach or, memang the taste not nice... hmm, you tell me.
There you go.... my updates... I was trying not to write so much of daily stuff cuz I might bore you then I can't have a post entitled "2000th hit" or even "1500th". *pfft..*

Aaaaaaaanyways, life's great with coffee now.... and also cuz there's so many ppl around me and my laptop, are full with their own sense of humour... different kinds - lame ones, funny ones, doesnt make sense ones, not funny ones but you still laugh, trying too hard ones, etc... which one are you? =)

P/S: I'm somehow happy today cuz knowing it's Easter soon, which also means the end to the season of Lent. (which also means can start gossipping dy.... JUST KIDDING!) =P

Update: OMG. My PIC (the guy in the video) actually read my blog.... -_-|||

Till then...

with the coffeeness in me,